Recently, I had the opportunity to attend a workshop with Irini Girgis from Kids summit. This workshop enabled me to understand the right age and amount of information we can share with our kids.
I still remember when Lil knight was 4yrs old he looked at me and said “Mama my penis is behaving weird” to which I asked him “what’s making him feel weird?” “It’s standing up!”
Luckily, my husband wasn’t too far he joined in the conversation and saved me from the awkward moment. Looking back and relating to what I learnt on the workshop. I think we as parents should be comfortable about the subject first. Only then will our kids feel safe to discuss this topic with us.
I still remember reading books to Knight D when I was pregnant. explaining to him how my body is changing. Each week we would look at the size of fetus talking about how his little brother is growing. This helped his understand pregnancy and how his brother would come into this world.
Here are a few things that were truly helpful
Use correct names
Quiet often we nickname are private parts this isn’t correct. Using the right terminology and words help kids understand without getting confused. Yes, we call it as it is penis, breast, vagina and so on.
2. Talk about no touch zones
I did this with LiL knight as he set off to foundation stage. I was worried if someone would touch him wrongfully. I wanted him to be able to come and tell me. We discussed the no touch zones and how to alert us about it. Everyday during bath I would ask if he went to the toilet on his own. How did he manage on his own.
3. No forced hugs, kissing or sitting on laps
Teach kids right from the beginning you can choose to give a hug if you’d like. This way they don’t feel forced and can say no if they aren’t comfortable.
Here’s the break up of age appropriate information
Questions asked during the session: My son keeps touching his penis. What do I do? Explain to your child that rubbing his penis can cause an infection or a rash. My son keeps playing with his penis. What do I do? Explain to your child I don’t want you to create a habit even when it feels good. When is the right time to start taking showers separately? Depends on each family dynamics. Usually about 6+ a child should be able to bathe on their own and learn about self care. My child says he wants to marry me. How do I handle this? Reaffirm you love him and that someday he will find his person to love. explain values behind marriage. How do I explain to my child about transgender? Explain to your child we are all different and sometimes we like doing different things. No matter what we will always love you and we are here if you need to talk.
Here are some helpful resources shared during the session:
Books:
Activities on pinterest